Sour Apple



  1. しないように努力してるけど家の犬って枝食べるんだよねぇ。遊ぶんじゃなくてマジで食うやつね。オガクズ排泄するからね。
    獣医に言ったら”あ～それ食べさせちゃ駄目ですねぇ”　俺：”だろうね”　俺の犬バカだからさ

ZachMartin

Despite my best efforts, my dog eats sticks. Not chews them, and spits them out. Eats them. Shits mulch.

I told the vet and he’s like, “Yeah, don’t let him do that.” “NO shit doc?” My dog is an idiot.

2. >それ用のテストあるぜ。生まれた時に行えばその後問題になるかどうかわかるよ。
まず動物を観察して尻尾を見るんだ。平べったい？異常に長い牙が生えてる？

>INTERNET_TRASHCAN 

There is actually a test for that. You can perform it pretty much at birth to determine whether this could be a problem. First you secure the animal, then you take a casual look at the tail. Is it flat? Does the dog have elongated front teeth?

3. >↑俺も最初言ってる意味がわからなかった。ビーバーのことね・・

>Threeedaaawwwg 

I was pretty confused at first. For those who didn’t get it, he’s talking about beavers

4. >俺バカだからさ・・・ありがと

>non-suspicious 

I’m dumb. Thank you.

5. 家のは糞を食べるよ。んで一日中くっせーゲップとか屁こく。枝でよかったな

LordoftheScheisse

Mine eats poop. Then spends the entire day burping and farting shit stench. Enjoy your sticks.

6.>おかしいよね。家のは自分の糞は食べないけど、散歩行くと他の犬の食うよ。
最初おきたときは何を口に入れたか分からなくて取り出そうとしてさ。あの時の状況思い出すだけでゾッとするよ。

>hermeslyre 

That’s crazy. Our dogs won’t eat their own poop, or each others in the yard thank god, but when we’re out on a walk they’ll gobble up strange poop if I don’t keep an eye on them.

First couple times it happened a couple years ago I’d put my hand in their mouth to pull out the object, not knowing what it was. I’ll never forget kneeling there in the grass with shit on my fingers and that thick brown skid mark running from the middle of her tongue down her throat.

I’m real careful now, but there was a long period there, when she was a puppy and I was completely ignorant of her favorite brand of trail mix. The fucked up thing is I’d walk them off the trails in the woods near the creek and we would come a crossed more hobo shit with napkins or leaves on top than any other kind. She partook, I know it. Nasty animal.

7.　>・・・・だから俺は猫派なんだよ

>aarghIforget 

This is why I’m a cat person.

8. >家の猫は糞が毛に絡まるからそれをフローリングに擦り付けるんだよねぇ。朝目覚めると床に茶色い一本線が引かれてる時がある。
猫もバカだぜ。

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coin_return 

My cat gets dingleberries sometimes and then wipes her ass across our hardwoods. When that happens, I usually wake up to a huge, brown smear down the hallway.

Cats are fucking stupid, too.

 

9. >マグネシウムとか栄養が不足してる時に糞食べちゃうみたいよ。たまにバナナでもあげてみたら？それか獣医に不足してる栄養剤貰うとか。

>martinu271 

They sometimes eat poop when they have some sort of deficiency, like magnesium. Try giving him/her a banana from time to time, or ask the vet to check for a vitamin/mineral deficiency.

10. >パイナップルも効果あるみたいだぞ。消化された後の糞が不味いらしいぜ。まぁ当然だが自分の糞に限るけどな

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chzplz 

You can also try feeding them pineapple. It supposedly becomes gross tasting after being digested. Only works if they eat their own poop, obvs.