親父に「Touching Tips」(先端同士が触れる)がLinkedIn語だと教えてやった話

俺の親父は大学の教授で元々アメリカ育ちじゃないから若い子が使う用語については二重にして疎い。だから最近の流行語とかいわゆる若者言葉ってのは全部俺と兄弟が教えてやってる。
そんな素敵な子供を持った親父に俺らは「先っぽタッチ」というのはLinkedIn内で「連絡を取り合う」なんだぜ、と説明してやった。例えば「先っぽタッチしませんか」＝「LinkedInで連絡取り合いましょう」とか「過去に先っぽタッチしたことありますか？」＝「LinkedInで以前お話しました？」みたいなね。
それから暫くたった頃の昨日の話なんだが、親父が大学で男子生徒とミーティングをしたらしいんだ・・・突然親父がもの凄い剣幕で俺に電話してきた。どうやらその生徒と別れ際に「いい話が出来た、あっところで以前先っぽタッチしたっけ？」と言ってしまったそうな。

TIFU by convincing my Dad that ‘Touching Tips’ is the term used for connecting on LinkedIn
submitted by Dexican
My Dad is a professor at a university and not originally from the USA which means he’s twice over not hip with lingo. Therefore he learns all his hip lingo from my two brothers and me!
So being great sons we decide to mess with him and tell him ‘Touching Tips’ is the new way of saying connecting on LinkedIn. You know, “let’s touch tips” = “connect with me” “Have we touched tips?” = “Have we connected on LinkedIn?” etc etc.
Fast forward to yesterday when he’s meeting a younger guy to work in his lab… I get an angry call from him later saying that he ended the interview with something like “All sounds good, have we touched tips?”

 

1.妻とその兄貴が義母に「Queef」（ま○屁）というのは「Fart」（屁）の丁寧語だと説明したらしい。教授である彼女は講義中に誰かが屁をこいて、場を和ませる為に「もぉ～、誰がQueefしたの？？」と確かに場を和ませたらしい。

HookEmTexx 

My Wife and Brother-In-Law once convinced my Mother-In-Law that queef was a polite way to say fart. She was teaching a seminar, someone passed gas and to get a reaction/break the ice, she asked the class ‘alright, who queefed??’ she did indeed get a reaction.

2.>>1
wwww俺だったら怒らないわ

>>1

soashamedrightnow 

That’s fucking funny. I wouldn’t even be mad.

3.だからこういうのって絶対言った後に「冗談だから」って念をおさねーと。馬鹿なの？

Singularity-1 

This is why you ALWAYS tell people that you’re joking once they believe you. Unless you’re an asshole.

4.>>3
だよな！そもそも騙すことが大事なわけで、痛めつけちゃだめだろ(´＿｀　)

>>3

A4B2C1 

Exactly! The fun is in the challenge to convince them. Not to harm them 🙁

5.>>4
いや、スレ主が正しいだろ。家族な訳だし、葬式で笑い話が一つ増えるじゃんｗｗ
いたずらとしては金メダル級だし、最終的に誰も傷ついてないんだからいいんじゃね

>>4

Imtroll 

Nope. OP did the right thing. Only got one family so when they pass away you’re gonna regret you don’t have any amazing stories to tell at their funeral.

I mean as far as pranks go this one is comedic gold and its relatively harmless in the grand scheme of things.

6.今日学んだ・・学生にセクハラって悪いことじゃないんだ・・（棒）人情がねーな

Maccaroney

TIL sexual harassment against a student isn’t a big deal? What planet are you from because it isn’t Earth.

7.>>6
教授。大学。
学生は１８歳以上。
学生がウケてた訳だしその後も正してるわけだろ。なんもわるくねーだろ。
それか他になにか情報あんの？

>>6

Imtroll 

Professor, University.

All the students are over 18.

The student corrected him. Seems like everything went ok to me.

Unless you know something I don’t.

8.妹の旦那（当時の彼氏）に「マラカス」ってキプロス語で「ありがとう」なんだぜって教えてやったわ。空港で彼が捕まった時は笑えなかったけどな

bitcleargas 

I told my sister’s husband (then boyfriend) that ‘malakas’ meant ‘thank you’ in Cypriot… She was not amused when he was arrested in the airport…

9.>>8
どゆこと？

>>8

phoenixink

Well, what does it mean?

10.>>9
ギリシャ語で「マスかき野郎」（性的な意味で）みたいな感じ。使い方によってもっと酷い意味。以前彼女に（現婚約者）叔父の誕生日に「σκατά να φάς, μαλάκα (skata na fas, malaka)」（糞でも食ってろ、馬鹿野郎）と言わせてやったわｗｗ。叔父は笑ってたけどね。家族同士で言うのなんてどってことないだろ。

>>9

Grounded-coffee 

It’s Greek for something like wanker (in that it references masturbatory habits) but is a bit more harsh, depending on how it’s used. I tricked my girlfriend (now fiancée) into wishing my uncle a Happy Name Day by saying σκατά να φάς, μαλάκα (skata na fas, malaka), which means something like “eat my shit, asshole.” My uncle was plenty amused. But it’s also used among friends as as a term of endearment, I call my father and brother it all the time.